


Perfect For You

by speedyvibraniumdevil



Series: Billy Russo [6]
Category: Billy Russo - Fandom, The Punisher - Fandom
Genre: Angst, F/M, Loki's there for like a second, Talk of War, a lot happens, but like mutual pining, forbidden love between a soldier and a princess, kind of enemies to lovers?, naval officer!Billy, possible smut idk, royal au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-26
Updated: 2019-04-01
Packaged: 2019-12-18 06:45:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 22,210
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18244517
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/speedyvibraniumdevil/pseuds/speedyvibraniumdevil
Summary: (Royal AU) You’re a princess who’s stubborn, feisty, and desperate for freedom, and you have a history of doing everything possible to scare off possible suitors for marriage. Needless to say, your father is just about done with you. However, when Captain Frank Castle and his very intriguing friend, Lieutenant Billy Russo, come to stay on the grounds to train new soldiers, you find an unexpected match in a sailor that challenges you in more ways than one.





	1. The Sad Orphan Boy and the Stubborn Princess

**Author's Note:**

> Hi. Yes this is a Billy Russo Royal AU, welcome to the party. But like, it’s my spin on it? Meaning things might not be 100% historically accurate and there might be Game of Thrones shit in there but history fucking sucks when it comes to women and minorities anyway so? ENJOY. The reader is very much like me in a lot of ways so be nice to her.

The king sat patiently at his throne, waiting for his guests to arrive. To his left, stood the hand of the king, Matthew, and to his right stood his son, Alex. They faced the large double doors that were down at the entrance of the throne room.

Suddenly, Matthew said, “They’re here.”

On cue, the doors finally opened, and all three men straightened their backs. The king exuded an effortless power, while the prince did his best to do the same, but wasn’t quite at the level of his father just yet.

They watched as the silhouettes of two men entered the hall and started their way forward onto the red carpet leading to the dais. The closer they got to the throne, the more the king could see their appearance. They might have looked different than the last time he had seen them, but they were still recognizable.

They were both fairly equal in size, and muscular. However, one of the men was much more rugged, and broader shouldered. His dark hair was starting to grow, slightly feathered out, his beard full. To a normal man, he would look intimidating, like he could break them in half as easy as breaking a toothpick.

The other man, however, was much leaner, maybe even a bit younger than his counterpart. His brunette hair was shoulder length, and he had a growing beard as well. He didn’t necessarily look like he could split you in two, but he looked like he had tricks up his sleeve. Like he had seen things others hadn’t. The both of them did. Which made sense considering their backgrounds.

They were each clothed head to toe in dark leather, with a sword strapped to their waists.

“Your Majesty, I present to you, Captain Francis Castle and Lieutenant William Russo of the naval infantry,” Matthew announced.

Francis and William kneeled at the face of the king, who didn’t take very long in speaking.

“Please, stand.”

They did so, with their hands behind their backs and their feet spread apart. It was a clear indication of their military training.

The king lost his usual hard gaze and grinned at them both, Frank in particular.

“It’s good to see you again, old friend.”

Frank gave the king a lopsided smile, “It’s been too long, your Majesty.”

The king rose from his throne and waved the title away with his hand.

“There’s no need for that, Frank. We’ve been through a bit together, haven’t we?”

He made his way down the steps of the dais until he was standing in front of the two men. He shook hands firmly with Frank.

“True, but you can never be too careful, Nick,” Frank chuckled. He then glanced to the man at his right. “You remember Billy, right?”

Nicolas turned his attention to Russo, who had been silent the entire time. He seemed to be a little more on edge with being in the king’s presence, and it made Nick want to laugh. He reached out his hand to Billy, who took it with equal firmness.

“Of course. How could I forget? I feel like you were just a boy when I last saw you. Now it seems you’ve quickly grown into one of the best in our army.”

Billy chuckled nervously. His smile was charming, and more boyish than Frank’s.

“Thank you, sir. I’ve only learned from the best,” he said, nodding in Frank’s direction.

“Frank always has been a one man cavalry.”

“There’s no lie in that.”

Frank slapped a hand over Billy’s shoulder. “Nah, but Billy’s got a natural talent for this kind of thing, Nick. I wouldn’t be alive if it weren’t for him. He’s family.”

Billy simply hummed and nodded at the sentiment. He could say the same thing about Frank. They had been through a lot together, the king could tell.

“Well, then. Allow me to express my gratitude, Lieutenant for keeping our Captain alive,” He bowed his head.

Billy gave the king a tight lipped smile. “Thank you, your Majesty. But, really, it wasn’t a hard thing to do. Like he said, we’re family.”

Nick smiled and then turned around to motion towards his son.

“Speaking of family….Frank, Billy, this is my son, Alexander, as you may know.”

They both bowed their heads and said, “Your highness.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you both,” the young man said. He looked to be about Billy’s age.

“And the princess?” Frank asked out of curiosity.

“Y/N is currently tending to business of her own at the moment,” Nicolas said and the whispered, “A new suitor.”

Frank and Billy nodded in understanding. It was common for a princess to be looking for a husband at this time.

Alexander snorted, “Then I’m sure it won’t take long before they meet her.”

“Now, Alex. Have faith in your sister. I’m sure she and the Prince of Asgard are having a wonderful time,” he said with a hopeful smile, but his eyes didn’t say the same.

Frank and Billy cast a sideways glance at each other, both in equal confusion. Samuel noticed this exchange, and chuckled.

“Let’s just say that finding a husband for my daughter has been a bit…difficult these past few years.”

Alex made a noise, which his father ignored.

“Y/N is a beautiful girl. I’m sure she has plenty men lined up to marry her,” Frank said.

Nick’s eyes flashed. “Trust me, old friend. Beauty is not the problem.”

That didn’t seem to answer the many questions the soldiers had. Billy, especially, didn’t know too much about what happened inside the castle walls. However, he did find himself intrigued by this mysterious princess. He wanted to see her for himself,  to meet her and see what exactly it was her father and brother were referring to.

The subject was dropped for the time being, as the king sighed and mentally shifted gears to the real topic at hand.

“So, I assume you got my letter, which is why you are here. Otherwise this would be a very confusing visit.”

Billy nodded. “Yes, your Majesty. You wanted us to train new soldiers for you. Is that right?”

Nicolas nodded and went back to sitting on his throne. Matters about the kingdom were dealt with on a king’s throne.

“Correct. Well, we all know our war with The Hand has only grown more and more tense over the years. We’ve had our best defenders on the line, fighting them back, but I’m afraid we’re still lacking the soldiers we need to stand a chance against their army.”

“Yeah, the damn sons of bitches pop out soldiers left and right,” Frank said.

“Some of the soldiers would even make up stories that they used some kind of dark magic, which I think is bullshit if you ask me,” Billy added.

“Magic or not, there are many of them, and it’s up to us to find the men to stop them as we are currently spread out too thin amongst Fisk’s and Gao’s men,” the king contended, “So, do you think you could be up for the task?”

Billy shifted his weight, and looked at Frank, waiting for his say. They had already come to an agreement before, but should his friend change his mind, he would be by his side, because he trusted his word over anyone else’s. Frank cast a sideways glance at his friend, as if communicating something telepathically. They nodded in some kind of non verbal agreement and turned back to look at the king.

“Billy and I have talked about it, Nick, and….” Frank smirked, “We’re ready when you need us.”

Nick smiled brightly with his pearly white teeth, and clapped his hands once with glee. “Perfect. I’ll give you full use of the old training grounds and any weapons you may need. You’ll also get a place to stay here in the castle, as well as food, clothes, and anything else you may require. Think of it as doing the same thing you do out in the battlefield, but without the death toll. At least for now.”

“Sounds great, your Majesty,” Billy said and then, “We just have one request, sir.”

The king leaned forward in his seat, preparing himself for whatever was to be asked of him. “What is it?”

“Our friend, Curtis Hoyle, sir. He was injured in battle, lost his leg in an explosion, so he can’t fight anymore. If it wouldn’t be too much, we’d like for him to have a place to stay here as well. He’s a damn good soldier and an even better healer, so he can be of use to you here.”

Nicolas nodded and didn’t hesitate to give an answer. “Done. The kingdom welcomes you and your friend with open arms.”

Billy and Frank’s faces brightened up.

“Thank you Nick,” Frank bowed his head and Billy followed suit.

“Of course, it’s my pleasure to-”

There was a bang as the double doors banged open and a series of disgruntled noises followed. The king looked above Frank and Billy’s heads, with confusion and then deflated with disappointment. The soldiers followed his line of sight, only to see an angry, raven haired man come up towards them. The front of his shirt was covered in red, but based on the alcoholic smell, it wasn’t blood.

“Unbelievable!” he exclaimed. “That is it. That! Is! It!”

As he continued his trajectory, he pushed past the two men parted to let himself through. Not caring that he was in the presence of a king, he walked up the steps. Frank moved to take out his sword, but Nick raised a hand to stop him, unfazed.

The man, who Billy quickly came to know as the Prince of Asgard, started ranting in the middle of the throne room.

“I have never been so insulted in my life! Do you know what she did? Do you want to know what your princess did? She insulted me. To my face! The whole time I was nothing but nice to her, and she looked at me like I was some vile thing. Can you believe it?? When back in my kingdom the women would beg to marry me. Then when she bothered to ask me a question  - and god forbid I answer with my honest opinion - she called me a ignorant swine and then spilled her wine on me! Do you know what these clothes are made out of!? These threads were imported from Egypt. Egypt! How dare she-”

“Alright, your highness that is enough,” Samuel said with the energy of an exasperated parent, which in this case he basically was. Loki shut his mouth, but he was clearly fuming and aching to say more. “I apologize sincerely for my daughter’s behavior. I don’t know what came over her. She should not have disrespected you the way she did, and I’ll see to it that this matter gets addressed immediately. If you wish, I will gladly pay you for your ruined attire.”

Some of these seemed to be rehearse, or like he had said something similar before.

“No disrespect, your Majesty, but I don’t need your money. What I need is my dignity back, which you can’t repay,” he adjusted his coat and sniffed.

Billy looked at the Prince with distaste. He hated these kinds of people. People with money and power who felt entitled to everything in their wake, even people. No wonder the princess did what she did. Billy felt some kind of respect for this mystery girl.

“Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ll be heading back to Asgard now. Where I’ll be treated with respect,” Loki said with finality and turned back around to go down the steps. He caught a glance at the two soldiers, who both glared at him. The Prince looked at them with a sneer, but Billy could tell he was scared.

Before heading out the door he called out, “Good luck marrying _her_  off!”

When the doors slammed behind him, the two soldier looked back at the king, who sank into this seat and put his face in his hand with a heavy sigh.

“Not again.”

“Not to add salt to the wound, but it looks like I was right yet again, father,” Alexander said. He looked back at the doors with disgust. “Good riddance, though. I would have preferred Thor.”

“Yes, but Thor is betrothed to a woman named Brunhilde. Or so I’m told,” Nicolas said.

He then quickly turned his attention to Frank and Billy, who were all caught up in the awkward situation, but looked very amused.

“I’m so sorry you had to witness that. However, I’m afraid that this isn’t the first time this has happened.”

“It’s alright, Nick,” Frank grinned.

The king turned to the brunette to his left. A man with misty eyes and a walking stick. Billy furrowed his brow. The king had a blind man for a hand? What good did that do him?

“Matthew, can you get Y/N for me please?”

Matthew smiled softly. “I’m afraid she’s already here, your grace.”

_How did he know that?_

Billy looked at Frank with massive confusion, and his friend returned the expression. And yet, the king didn’t question it.

“Y/N,” he called out. “Come out here, please.”

The soldier looked around and expected to see nothing, they expected Matthew to be wrong, but they were shocked to see a shadow coming forward from the left side of the room. Billy caught the faint shape of hair and a dress, but could hardly see your features from a distance.

“Yes, father?” you said innocently.

“Come forward please,” Nick said. His tone was warmer this time, but didn’t lack that parental disapproval.

When you came closer to the light, Billy could hardly take his eyes off of you. They widened of their own volition, and he felt breathless at the sight of you.

Your hair was pulled back in a neat updo, exposing your beautiful face for the world to see. You had a natural glow to you with features that suited you so perfectly and he couldn’t help but admire. There was something about your eyes, especially right now. They were full of life and opinions, but soft and kind. Everything he would expect a princess to be, but somehow more.

Maybe it was because you were with your family, but you carried yourself in a way that wasn’t fragile or dainty. You were sure of the steps you took.

Overall, you were one of the most beautiful women he had ever seen, and he had seen plenty.

“Y/N, I’d like to introduce you to Captain Francis Castle and Lieutenant William Russo. They’ll be staying here as our guests while they train the new recruits. Remember I told you?”

“Yes, I remember.” Your curtsied, “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Captain and Lieutenant.”

Your eyes scanned over them as they bowed, but they lingered over Billy’s face for a moment, who tried not to make too much eye contact, but couldn’t help himself when his eyes found yours. Without revealing any emotion, your attention went back to your father, sure of yourself, as if you hadn’t done anything wrong at all.

“You wanted me?”

“As a matter of fact, yes,” he sighed and opened his mouth to speak, but thought better of it first. He turned to the man at his right, the hand of the king and said, “Matthew, can you please give these men the tour of the palace? Take Karen if you need to. Oh, and make sure they know where the training grounds are.”

Matthew bowed his head, “Yes, your Majesty,” and gestured for Frank and Billy to follow him down towards the entrance. Without much effort, he went down the stairs and led the way.

Before they could go, Nicolas stopped them to say, “We’ll be having a feast this evening to welcome you both. Before then, I’ll make sure you’re taken to your chambers so you can rest.”

They both nodded, “Thank you,” and followed Matthew out the throne room. Billy looked behind him once more, to catch another glimpse at the princess, who he swore was looking right at him too.

* * *

“Alex, I’d like to speak to your sister, alone.”

“But-” the Prince began to protest.

“Now,” the king said more firmly.

Your brother shook his head at you and you rolled your eyes. Even though he was older and the king to be, he still acted like a child sometimes. He exited the same way you came in, through a door that was hidden in the shadows. When it was clear that he was gone, and the room was silent, Nicolas finally started speaking.

“Y/N….Can you explain to me why yet another prince has angrily stormed out of the building?”

“This one was a fan of the dramatics, wasn’t he?”

“Y/N…”

“I thought he was very clear as to why he was angry.”

“You spilled wine on him?”

You shrugged, “It was an accident. I tripped. It’s not my fault he was particularly attached to his clothes.”

“He said you called him an ignorant swine.”

“It may have slipped, within good reason.”

“This isn’t funny, Y/N. You can’t keep rejecting every suitor that comes in here!”

“Why not? I can’t help it if I don’t like them, father. And were you really thinking about marrying me off to that buffoon? Did you really think I’d swoon and bat my eyes when all he could talk about was himself? Please. I don’t know why you keep insisting on finding a man for me, when I never asked for that.”  

“Y/N, you’re the princess of Anvil, and a princess must be-”

  
“Married to a prince,” you finished with an eye roll. “I know the law. It’s an old one.  And I still don’t see the point when I’m not even going to be the one sitting on this throne. I’m not going to become queen of Anvil, so why are you so adamant about handing me off to some other man I don’t even love?”

“Love? Is that what this is about? You want to find true love?”

You crossed your arms and looked at your father defensively.

“Is it such an insane thing to want?”

“No, of course not. Not necessarily.”

“Then?”

“Okay, so you want love….but how do you expect someone to fall in love with you, if you don’t even give them a chance? Any one of those men could have been the one and you rejected them.”

“If they were the one, they wouldn’t have run away. Simple.”

You father sighed, “I don’t understand you.”

“Welcome to the party father, you’re late.” You frowned, “So far, every single suitor you’ve brought in here has been a snooty bastard and it doesn’t take very long to get to know those. They’re so selfish and self-absorbed. Sexist even.”

“Is that why you called Loki an ignorant pig?”

“He said, ‘Who cares about the peasants? They’re meant to serve us anyway.’ Ugh. It was almost as bad as the one who said, ‘A woman’s place is-’ before I pushed him in the fountain.”

“I admit, he definitely wasn’t the one for you,” the king conceded, “But, you have this habit of going into these things with your claws out, Y/N. I don’t know why, but you can’t be like that all the time. You can’t expect them to be perfect, either. One day, you have to realize that.”

“I don’t want them to be perfect…I just want them to be…” you looked off thoughtfully, not able to find the words.

“Perfect for you?”

You looked at your father, having hit the nail on the head a little too perfectly. Still, you shrugged.

He sighed, “Then for your sake, I hope you find someone that challenges you. That would be a true perfect match.”

* * *

Frank and Billy followed closely behind Matthew, who was holding onto the arm of a red headed woman, named Karen. The two men were still very confused over the whole thing

Never had they heard of a disabled man in such a high position of power, let alone one that seemed to detect people’s presence without needing to see. It made Billy wonder if he was faking it or not, but based on his eyes, he could tell he wasn’t.

“I know what you’re thinking,” he said, as they kept walking.

Billy looked uneasy. “You do?”

“Of course. It’s the question that runs through everybody’s minds when they see me, which is, ‘Why on earth would king make a blind man his hand?’ Well, let’s just say, I might be blind, but I see things others can’t.”

“You mean like seer? You have visions?” Frank asked.

Matthew chuckled, “No, nothing like that. My hearing is just very spectacular.”

They almost didn’t want to believe it, but up until now, they had no real reason to, considering that he knew the princess was in the throne room before anyone else did. Nicolas didn’t question it either, and Frank trusted him, so in turn, Billy did too.

They turned a corner and came upon a large field. In the middle of the field was a large wooden fence, creating training ring and past it, was what looked like stables. Matthew stopped just a few feet from the ring.

“Here it is. The training grounds.”

Frank and Billy regarded the grounds for a moment, before taking the liberty to exploring it themselves. Matthew guided them to the armory, and immediately, the soldiers picked up different weapons to regard them. Billy tested the weight of each sword, only to find that he still preferred his own.

“You’ve got a good selection here,” he said.

“An armory fit for a king,” Matthew grinned.

Frank looked out at the training ring and smile tugged at his lips. He looked at Billy, who quirked an eyebrow at him.

“What?”

Frank motioned to the ring with his head. “What do you say we have a practice round before the big feast?”

Billy smirked, “An opportunity to kick your ass? Can’t say no to that.”

He practically skipped into the ring and drew his sword, all the while Frank was rolling his eyes.

“Don’t get too cocky, Lieutenant. You never know what could happen.”

“Why don’t you take out your weapon and we’ll see.”

Frank shook his head, and took out his sword, muttering things under his breath.

“What was that?” Billy asked mockingly. Frank took the opportunity to swing his sword at him, who then raised his own, and with a clang the blades crashed together.

* * *

The sound of metal against metal rang around the training grounds. It was what drew you away from your course to your chambers and led you to the scene before you. The only person you had ever seen use it in a while was your brother, so it made you wonder who could be using it this time.

To your surprise, it was the guests your father was having stay at the castle. The men from the naval infantry, Captain Frank and Lieutenant William.

You joined Matthew and Karen, who were standing on the outside watching as well. Or, on Matthew’s case, sensing. 

They greeted you with smiles.

“Came to watch the show?” Matthew asked.

“Anything to take my mind off what just happened in there,” you said, to which he chuckled.

“I assure you, this is doubly more entertaining.”

It was true.

You were instantly mesmerized by their swordsmanship. You had watched your brother train before, but he was nowhere near as good as these two men. They seemed to know every move before the other one even thought about doing it and they swung with such momentum and precision.

Frank swung his sword at Billy, who blocked it easily with his own blade with a clang. Multiple times, they swung and blocked. Each of them too good, and anticipating the other’s moves. They breathed heavily, the brows furrowed in concentration.

“Come on, Bill. Is that the best you can do?”

Billy laughed, “Maybe I’m just tiring you out, Frankie. You ever thought about that?”

“I could do this all day, pretty boy.”

Billy lunged this time with a grunt, twice, but Frank dodged it and raised his sword to it crossed with Billy’s again.

You found the way they interacted amusing. Especially since at the moment, they were unaware of your watching them.

For some reason, your eyes started to drift towards the Lieutenant. William was his name. You liked it. There was something about him that caught your eye. You had met so many men, so many of the same kinds but also different, and you learned how to tell them apart, even from a distance. The snooty and entitled versus the ones who seemed desperate and clingy.

However, you couldn’t quite place William.

At one point he laughed in the middle of the fight, and you felt yourself going breathless.

When they separated once again and circled around each other, it was then that he glanced in your direction. It was a fraction of a second, a glimpse, but it was enough for him to do a double take. It was almost comical. You had your etiquette training to thank for how composed you stayed despite the way he looked at you.

The Captain, Francis, looked behind him to see what his friend was looking at and he smiled. Did they know what you did to Prince Loki? Of course they did, they were there when he went into a tirade. Did they think you were some mad princess? No doubt.

Not your best first impression, to say the least, but then again, you were tired of having to please every man you met. If they thought you mad, then good. Less unwanted suitors to be lined up at your door.

You waved at them and smiled back.

Francis turned his attention back to William, and said something to him that you couldn’t hear. William shook his head and twirled his sword, before he two continued to fight once again.

You would have stayed to watch until someone lost, but in the distance, towards the inside of the castle, you noticed a group of men coming this way. Your father or Peter no doubt, coming to join the fun. After the interaction from before, you really weren’t in the mood to talk to either of them yet.

You put a hand on Matthew’s arm and said, “I should go. Make sure to tell me who wins.”

He looked a little confused, but said, “Will do.”

With one last glance at Francis and William, you pushed yourself away from the edge of the ring, and headed off towards the gardens.

* * *

“Frank, Billy!” the Prince’s voice cut across the ring, stopping the two men from taking another lunge at each other. They were covered in sweat now, their chests heaving from the duel. Billy looked towards the side of the ring that you had been watching from, but to his disappointment, you were gone.

Both he and Frank turned their attention to Peter and bowed their heads to him.

“Your highness.”

“You mind if I join in?”

“By all means, Alexander. Grab a sword.”

* * *

The feast was a lively event, with tables filled with food and music playing in the background. Numerous guests of different nobility attended as well as the king’s guard. The royals sat at the front of the room. Alex and Matthew on one side of Nicolas, and Y/N was on the other.

It was nothing like Billy had ever attended.

He and Frank sat amongst the guard, at a table that was right in front of the royals. Every now and then, Billy would look at the princess, who seemed to be fairly unhappy to be there. Every now and then she’d talk to Karen, who stood by her.

He was taking a sip of his wine, when Frank nudged him with his shoulder. When Billy turned to look at him, his friend had a smug look on his face.

“What?” he asked.

“I wouldn’t go there if I were you, bud.”

“What are you talking about?”

Frank looked around to make sure no one was listening, but the other men seemed pretty preoccupied with their food and own business. Still, he lowered his voice.

“The princess,” he said. “It hasn’t even been a whole day and you’re already moonin’ over her.”

“I’m not moonin’ over her,” Billy said defensively.

Frank snorted, taking a bite of his turkey leg. “Coulda fooled me. You shoulda seen your face when she was watching us earlier. I know you’re used to the girls falling for you, Bill. But this one? I’m just saying, it ain’t gonna happen.”

“I’m not stupid, Frank. I know better than to get tangled up with a princess.”

Of course he did.

“Good…because Nick would have your fucking head.”

Billy worked his jaw and swallowed thickly. She was just another pretty girl - a beautiful girl, and he wasn’t going to let that distract him. He was here for one thing and for one thing only, and that was to train soldiers for the army. There was a war at stake, and he knew better.

Then, why, oh why, did he look up again? It was like he could feel her eyes on him or something, because when he took another glance, this time, she was looking back at him. But just as quickly as their eyes connected, she averted her gaze.

* * *

You could only stand these things for so long. The feasts. You always preferred the bigger events, the balls, because at least there’d be dancing, but not at these. These glorified dinners. You had to get out of there. You were over this, so done with this. All you ever did was sit around and listen to everyone else talk. Nobody cared about you here, not even your own father it seemed sometimes.

You looked for Karen, who was apparently busy talking to Captain Francis. It made you wonder what they were talking about. You chanced a look at his friend, William, who was too wrapped up in his dinner.

_That’s it._

With a sigh, you got up from your seat. Your father gave you a strange look, and then pleaded with his eyes for you to stay, but you shook your head. So, you headed for the hidden exit no one else knew about, away from the crowd, and headed to one of the many places you could escape to.

* * *

Billy decided to go out and get some fresh air. Only Frank could endure being social for so long. Billy didn’t mind it, but there came a point where it got overwhelming. He was sure nobody would mind if he stepped out for a while.

So, he exited the dining hall, with his hands in his pockets. Every pathway was lit with torches, so as to not get lost in the dark. Although, the castle still looked ominous as it towered above him.

It was a wonder that he had always dreamed of living in one, and now here he was, but he wasn’t sure how to feel about it. Not yet. In those boyish dreams, he dreamed himself a king with money and power. How foolish.

He walked the path he somewhat knew now, past the training grounds and towards the stables. He hadn’t been there yet, and it didn’t seem like a bad time to explore. There was light inside too. Someone must have been there recently.

It didn’t occur to him that someone would be in there now, not at this time in the evening, until he heard a voice speaking. Listened in to see if there was more than one, but he couldn’t make out another. Just one, and it sounded female. He reached the entrance and peeked his head inside, only to see you standing in there, petting one of the horses.

He jumped back, intending to just leave you be, but you caught his movement in a flash.

“Who’s there?” you asked.

He barred in teeth in frustration.

“Sorry, your highness. I didn’t know you were in here.”

Billy started to back away, but you stopped him.

“Wait!”

He stopped him his tracks and stepped back into the stables.

“You’re William, right? William Russo.”

“Yes, your highness.”

You hesitated for a moment. “I saw you and your friend at the training grounds earlier. The both of you are very good swordsman. I don’t think I’ve seen anything like it.”

“Thank you, your highness.”

“Call me, Y/N, please. I think people often forget I have a name, around here.”

Billy couldn’t help the small smile that graced his lips. “Alright, Y/N.”

“What about you? Do you normally go by William, or…?”

“My friends call me Billy.”

“Billy,” she said, testing out the name. “I like it. Almost as much as I like William.”

He chuckled, “You can call me William if you want, your highness.”

“Y/N,” you corrected him.

“Y/N.”

“Does nobody call you William?”

“Never in a personal context, no.”

“I could be the first.”

“If that’s what you wish.”

You furrowed your brow and looked at him curiously.

“What?” he asked.

“Nothing, nothing,” she said, although Billy was unconvinced. You continued to pet the white horse gently.  “I’m sorry you had to witness the Asgardian’s tirade on your first day. I promise you they’re not all like that. Although I hear his sister is quite the frightening woman, which I’m sure isn’t any better than what they’ll be saying about me after that prick goes back.”

You winced at your own cursing and looked at him apologetically. “Sorry.”

Billy laughed, “No, it’s fine. I’ve heard far worse from the mouths of sailors.”

“But not from a lady.”

“You’d be surprised.”

Once again, you gave him a look.

“I’m sure you think I’m insane anyways.”

Billy narrowed his eyes, “Why do you say that?”

“Well, no doubt my father told you this wasn’t the first time I’ve done this. Not to mention the Prince of Asgard made it very clear how much of a foul creature I am.” You stepped away from the horse and looked at him. “Do you think he’s right, William? Do I seem like one to you?”

“Not as far as I can tell, princess.”

You hummed in amusement, knowing that he was probably kissing your ass due to your royalty. “Well, you’ve never met a princess like me before, and you still have plenty of time to get to know me and change your mind.”

“That seems to be the recurring theme around here,” you said in a lower voice to the horse.

Billy cocked an eyebrow. He indeed had never met a princess that talked the way you did. There was an undertone of self deprecation and sarcasm in the things you said, and he wasn’t sure if you were doing it on purpose or not.

“I’ve never met an Asgardian before either, but if it’s any reassurance, Y/N,” Billy said, “From the five minutes I heard him speak, I think the Prince deserved what he got.”

You looked at him in disbelief, a grin curling at your lips. This was the first time anyone had ever approved of something you had done. Especially something so aggressive.

“Thank you. As a matter of fact, he did.”

Billy snorted. With a sigh, you stepped over to the entrance of the stables, next to Billy and looked up at the sky. He leaned back against the doorframe and did the same thing.

“Do you have anyone, Mr. Russo?”

He furrowed his brow. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, do you have anyone special waiting for you back home? A lady perhaps? Children?”

You were asking out of pure curiosity, of course. It wouldn’t surprise you if he did have someone. He was an attractive male after all, and a soldier. You talked enough with your handmaids to know that they loved men like that.

But to your dismay, he looked like he wanted to laugh and said, “No, I don’t.”

This perked you up.

“Really? No love interests? No one to come back home to after a battle?”

He chuckled nervously. You liked his smile. 

“The only constant person I’ve had for a long time is Frank and the men in our infantry, and the only real home I’ve had…is the sea, your highness. Any woman or place I encounter outside of that is just part of the adventure.”

“Huh,” you crossed your arms, imagining the places he must have been to. “So you’ve been to many places. Haven’t you, Mr. Russo?”

He smiled. You wished you could see the places he was envisioning within his eyes.

“Many.”

“Is it as exciting as one would imagine?” you asked with interest.

“Have you never been on an adventure, your highness?”

“Y/N,” you corrected again.

“Y/N.”

“And no. ‘The real world is a dangerous place for a princess’. Or so my father tells me.”

He sighed, “Then, yes. It’s as exciting as one would imagine.”

You beamed at that and Billy had to look away should he stare for too long. 

This conversation was already more interesting than most you had before.

“So, tell me,” you said, inching closer to him, eager to get an answer. “In any one of those places, did you fall in love?”

He was utterly amused with your questions, but also borderline uncomfortable. A part of him told him that he shouldn’t be talking to you like this. Not when Frank had just warned him about you. It could get him in trouble. Still, he thought about the question.

“I came close a few times, but, no not really,” he brushed it off. “Then again, I’ve never been a hopeless romantic to begin with.”

He walked over to the closest horse, and dark raven colored on, and starting petting it.

You raised an eyebrow at him. “Why do I find that hard to believe?”

“Your guess is as good as mine, princess,” he smirked.

You regarded him for a bit, with dissecting eyes. You knew he could sense you, but still, he kept his eyes on the horse. He was avoiding your gaze on purpose, and you weren’t sure how to feel about it.

You tore your eyes away from him and looked up to the sky once again.

“Either way it must be nice. A life outside of these walls where you can love as you do or do not please. To have freedom. No father to control you or to hand you off to someone else. No guards to follow you around.  Sounds like you’ve live a very privileged life, William.”

Billy’s hand froze in mid air and pulled his head back at your words. For once he couldn’t control his expression, and gave you the strangest look.

He scoffed, “Privilege?”

Your head snapped in his direction, wondering what he was on about.

“What?” you asked.

Billy tried containing himself. You were a royal after all and the thoughts going through his head were not befitting for a soldier to tell a princess.

“Nothing. Nothing, your highness,” he was more clipped and tight lipped than before, which you noticed.

You crossed your arms, your attention fully on him again. “You laughed at what I said. Tell me why.”

“You wouldn’t like it.”

“Why not? Tell me what’s so funny,” you demanded.

Billy resisted the urge to roll his eyes and looked down at his feet. He licked his lips before letting his mind speak.

“No disrespect, but your saying that I, a soldier, have a privileged life over you, a princess…is quite comical, your highness,” he enunciated her title, which visibly made her uneasy.

“I don’t find it funny. I’m simply stating what I think is true.”

“Well, it’s not.”

“Enlighten me, then.”

Billy shifted his weight. The subject clearly triggered him in a way he didn’t expect it to. “It’s funny, your highness, because you’ve had privilege your whole life. You’ve had it since the day you were born. I haven’t. You talk poorly of these princes that have been waited on hand and foot when you’re guilty of it as well.”

Your jaw dropped open in offense.

“How dare you? I’m nothing like them. You don’t know a thing about me or what I feel.”

He bit back a laugh. Billy didn’t know what came over him, but he couldn’t stop it. He had dealt with plenty of rich assholes in his life, looking down at him, and he should have remembered that you were in the same boat as them. That mentality was hard to miss.

“Maybe not, your highness. But I do know this….You’ve never had to struggle to survive through a single day in your life.”

Every time he said your highness it was like a slap. Never had anyone used your title in an insulting manner before. You stepped toward him, unafraid, and he stood tall in the same demeanor.

“And you? What about you, soldier? How are you any better?”

Your face was inches from his, your eyes full of anger. Is this was the Prince of Asgard faced earlier that day? Maybe for a coward like him, it would have been enough to scare him away, but Billy had faced death multiple times in his life, and it took a lot to frighten him.

“‘Better?’ The fact that you think my life is somehow better than yours proves that you clearly don’t know shit about me either. You wanna know where I grew up? I grew up just outside of those walls,” he pointed off into the distance, “In the streets. I lost my parents at an early age. I had no place to call home. I’d beg for scraps, sometimes stole from the market and then ran like hell so I wouldn’t get caught only to have it taken away by some other kids. I wore the same tattered rags for years. I didn’t have anything or anybody. So, I’m sorry your highness, if I’m having a hard time feeling sorry for you.”

He side stepped away from you. For the first time in forever, you were left speechless. For the first time your stubbornness had gotten the best of you, and you didn’t know how to react. Your anger and pride wanted you to keep fighting, to keep defending yourself, to have the last word.

You whirled around to face him as he was making his way out the stables. 

“I don’t  _want_  you to feel sorry for me,” you spit out.

He stopped and twisted in your direction. “Good. I don’t want your pity either.”

“Good.”

For a moment you faced off and when neither of you said anything you said, “Get out. I want to be alone.”

“Was already planning on it, your highness.”

When he disappeared around the corner, you didn’t know what to do with yourself. The only logical thing was to angrily sit down on a square of hay, and scream into your hands.

You had done this countless times before. Run men out of your room, out of the castle, and you never felt sorry for it. You never backed down.

But this time….this time was different. And you hated the way it made you feel.


	2. Starting Over

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In this chapter, the reader and Billy keep their distance from each other as much as they can. However, as much as her pride is hurt, she knows that she made a mistake, and later finds a way to apologize.

The next morning, Billy woke up with an anxious start. It was how it usually was in the mornings, since his dreams were often riddled with memories of his dark childhood and bloody battle. It was rare for him to sleep comfortably through the night.

He sat up in his bed, and ran his fingers through his long locks, taking in the room before him.

He was no stranger to sleeping in new places. As a soldier, the state of living varied, so he had to get used to sleeping from a mattress to rock solid ground. However, this room he was currently in, was much more luxurious that he was used to.

Given that they were all guests by request of the king, Billy and Frank both received their own rooms, and both were highly well decorated. Everything was made of the finest silks, cottons, wood, and gold. There were nightstands, rugs, a four poster bed, and its own bathroom. On the wall, there was even a large window overlooking the courtyard below.

Billy expected nothing less from a palace, but it was still strange to be experiencing it this was. He wasn’t complaining, as a matter of fact, he liked it. He just learned to never get used to such luxuries ever since he was a child. There was never a point. None of it would ever be his.

No doubt this was only a fraction of the size of the princess’ room.

He hissed. _The princess._

He sat at the edge of the bed and furrowed his brow as memories from the night before came rushing back into his mind. The conversation he had had with you in the stables.

_Son of a bitch. What the hell did I do?_

Talking to a princess like that would have cost him a hand in some kingdoms and in others, his head. People have been killed for far less offenses. Which is why, he always kept to his place. He was a soldier, and soldiers had their own rules and duties to follow.

At this point, he should’ve been dragged out of the castle by the king’s guard, and yet, to his dismay, he was still in his bed, safe and sound.

Why was that?

Billy started getting dressed, and as he buttoned up his pants, he walked over to the window and took a look outside. Maybe he was hoping to see guards marching up, or you passing by by some chance.

But no, to his relief and disappointment, all was at peace in the castle.

* * *

Karen carefully arranged and pinned your hair with her delicate hands, as you sat on the small stool at your vanity mirror. Your gaze was on yourself in the reflection, however, your mind was elsewhere.

You couldn’t stop thinking about Billy, and the conversation you had with him last night.

You kept replaying it. It was odd. You were no stranger to confrontation with men, and yet, this one stuck with you like no other. Maybe it was because you often left those other confrontations feeling good about yourself, like you had won and you were right. Considering the pompous suitors your father had sent to you, it was not even a question.

But, Billy….

It hurt you to even think it…but Billy…was right. Wasn’t he? If everything that he said about his life was true, then yes. For the first time your judgements and assumptions got the best of you. You were in the wrong and it drove you mad. It hurt your pride (not that you’d say it out loud), and you didn’t know what to do with yourself.

You couldn’t run this one out of the castle. If you were being honest with yourself, you didn’t want to.

“Something bothering you, Y/N?” Karen’s voice brought you back to reality.

You found her eyes in the mirror and fashioned a smile onto your face, as if you weren’t just frowning a few seconds earlier.

“No. No, why would there be?”

She shrugged, “I don’t know. You just seem very deep in thought. I couldn’t help but assume it was something serious.”

“No, no, I just….I was remembering a dream is all.”

Her hands stopped moving for a second.

“The same one?”

Her bright blue eyes looked back at you with concern and you had to take a deep breath so as to keep any possible tears at bay. All you did was nod and she dropped the subject, getting back to finishing your hair.

It wasn’t a total lie. You did in fact have a terrible dream last night, nothing to do with Billy at all. No, but it had everything to do with your mother.

Ever since she passed away when you were younger, she appeared in your dreams a lot. It wasn’t everyday, but rather, they came in waves, and sadly, they were never nice dreams. And usually, they were variations of the same one.

Which was: You alone in the castle, desperately searching for your mother, everywhere, calling out her name, crying, but never finding her. And at the same time something would be chasing you or something horrid would happen.

This time, it was all happening in the middle of a burning building, and with each passing second, you could feel yourself suffocate and start to burn.

It was by far, the worst rendition to date.

“There,” Karen said briskly, “You’re all set.”

You leaned forward and examined her work in the mirror, turning your head from one side to the other. It was a simple look, with the front pieces of your hair pinned to the sides, while the rest was down. The pins had lavender flowers on them, to match the dress you were wearing.

Your grinned up at Karen and thanked her as you always did.

* * *

So, you didn’t run William Russo out of the castle. You figured with what you did with the prince of Asgard (and every prince before that), you were on pretty thin ice with your father as it was, so getting his military guest kicked out would be a breaking point.

At least, that’s what you tried to tell yourself to cover up for the fact that you didn’t want him to leave just yet. You still had things to discover, things to say to him, you just weren’t sure what yet. And if you were being honest, your pride was still pretty hurt.

So, for the time being, you decided to keep your distance and keep the talking to a minimum. For the most part, it was easy. You only saw each other when you needed to and exchanged very few words.

“Your Highness,” he’d bow his head. The name still irritated you, especially coming from him.

“Lieutenant,” you respond in the same tone.

They were only a few words, but the tension was clearly there. You were sure anyone around you could sense it, Matt especially. Although he never mentioned it.

However, the talking or lack thereof wasn’t what got you, though. What got you were the glances. Because, just when you thought you could block him out all together, you’d lock eyes. Whether it was in the halls, at the dining table, or passing by the training grounds. You’d think he’d look at you with anger or distaste, but he didn’t. There was something else there, like he had the same longing or curiosity that you had.

And you hated it. You hated it for making it hard to hate him. Hating him would be easier to decipher and understand than this. You tried hard to avoid eye contact because of that very reason, but it was hard.

When his other friend, Curtis Hoyle finally arrived to the castle, Billy and Frank immediately came to find you to make an introduction. No doubt it was Frank’s idea.

You were in the garden, a big glass paneled room filled with plants from all over the world. There was a stone path and a glass catwalk up above to get a better look at the trees.

It was one of your favorite places to spend time in. It was like a breath of fresh air. In a world where it’s air was often filled with smoke and gunpowder, it was nice to have a space protected from that. Matt described it as a palate cleanser for the soul, which you thought was perfectly apt.

That day, the two of you walked amongst the greenery, arms linked, down the stone path.

It was then that the group of three men entered the garden and found you amongst it. Frank was pushing Curtis in his wheelchair, bright smiles on both of their faces. Billy followed closely behind, smiling, but only slightly.

You tried to avoid his gaze and focused on Curtis as they introduced you.

“Y/N, this is our friend Curtis Hoyle. Me, him, and Billy have served in battle for years, and have been friends for longer than that.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Curtis,” you smiled wide.

“The pleasure is all mine, your Highness,” he bowed his head.

“And this is, Matthew. He’s the hand of the king and a very dear friend of ours,” you motioned to Matt, who smiled.

“Yes, I’ve heard many things about you, Mr. Murdock. About both of you. It’s a pleasure to finally meet you,” Curtis said.

“All good things I hope,” you mused, although you were used to the opposite.

“Yes, good things, fascinating things.”

You hummed, “‘Fascinating’ is a very nice way to put it, but thank you.”

Matt chuckled, “Yes, thank you. It’s a pleasure to meet you too. The king is very much looking forward to having another mind on the war council.”

They all nodded, musing about the plans they had.

Talk of this war always made you uneasy. To think of the lives being lost at the blades of the Hand, of the dangers these men and your brother were going to put themselves through. It made you feel useless considering how little they ever wanted to tell you or teach you. The only one you dared ask, or who dared tell you anything, was Matt. But even then, he’d shut you off for your own protection.

When there was a lull in the conversation, you decided to change the subject.

“I’m sorry to hear about what happened, Mr. Hoyle,” you said somberly, referring to the leg that he lost in an explosion. “How are you feeling?”

“Well, it hasn’t been easy, but I’ve had plenty of time to deal with it all. I’m even better now that I’m out of the line of fire, and reunited with these two idiots - if you don’t mind me saying.”

You chuckled, “No, I don’t. But I’m glad you’re feeling well. You’re welcome to stay for as long as you like, and if you need anything, just know that we’re more than happy to provide.”

The voice you used was very princess-like. You never liked using it, but it came out unconsciously at certain times. Years of etiquette training were hard to beat.

“Thank you, your Highness.”

“Please, call me, Y/N,” you corrected, and cast a glance at Billy.

He looked down immediately.

“Y/N,” Curtis repeated with a grin. “Thank you, Y/N.”

“Did you already show him the training grounds?” Matt asked.

“We’re actually headed there right now,” Frank nodded. “Figured Billy and I would give Curt a show.”

“Well, I’m sure that’ll be anything but boring. These two are great fighters,” Matt commented.

Curtis raised his eyebrows, “Oh yeah, Frank and Bill told me you could see without seeing, correct? If you don’t mind me asking.”

“Yes, that’s true. I can’t see with my eyes but doesn’t mean I can’t see plenty.”

You felt the urge to jump in.

“Matt might be blind, Curtis, but he’s the smartest, cleverest man I know. He used give me lessons a few years back. Not once did he let his disability get in the way of his love for learning, teaching, or strategy.”

Matt smiled with gratitude. “She likes to brag about me.”

“With reason. You’re respectable man, Mr. Murdock.”

Now Billy was the one who spoke, and your eyes flew to him. It made you falter a bit, but your teachings kept you cool.

“Thank you, Lieutenant.”

“Indeed,” you mused. “He’s taught me a lot of things. Not just about the world, but about life. I’m still learning, clearly.”

“Aren’t we all, your Highness?”

You kept your eyes on each other a little too long, until Frank cleared his throat. You tore your eyes away from him and pasted a smile on your lips.

“He’s right,” Curtis said. “Life is all about learning and being better versions of ourselves.”

You hummed, “I really want to believe that, Mr. Hoyle.”

For your own sake.

“Anyways, we should be heading off, princess. Don’t want to keep you for too long,” Frank said.

“It was a pleasure to meet you, Curtis,” you and Matt said.

You bowed your heads at each other.

“And happy training, Captain, Lieutenant,” you bowed your head to both of them and stepped aside so the three of them could wheel Curtis out of there.

When they were gone, you let out a deep breath you didn’t realize you had been holding in.

“Seems like a nice man,” Matt commented.

You nodded, you mind still elsewhere, “Yes, Curtis seems very nice.”

“Oh, I wasn’t talking about Curtis.”

“Then who?”

“The one you obviously have an interest in. Lieutenant Billy Russo.”

You dropped your jaw and smacked him in the arm. “Matthew! I do not!”

He laughed, “You forget you can’t hide anything from me, Y/N. And this wasn’t particularly hard to decipher considering that I’ve never heard your heart beat so fast around anyone when it wasn’t in anger. In fact, I’ve noticed it before, but never said anything.”

“It’s nothing,” you shrugged trying to play it cool, “I just think he’s attractive, is all.”

“That’s it?” he asked facetiously.

You scowled at him though he couldn’t truly see it.

“Yes, that’s it,” you argued.

“Well that’s surprising considering that that’s never stopped you from hating other men before.”

“Well, it’s not like I’m being forced to marry him, Matt. Besides, he’s not as internally horrendous or stupid as all the others,” you said, and then tried to save yourself by adding, “All three of them are great men. Maybe it’s a military thing.”

“Maybe so.”

“A code of honor, or something.”

“Or something.”

He kept smiling at you smugly, his hands resting against his cane.

“Anyways,” You proceeded to pick up your dress skirt with the intention of leaving. “If you’ll excuse me, I’m going to the library to read a book.”

Matt furrowed his brow. “Not going to watch the show?”

He referred to Frank and Billy going to train.

“I think I’ll sit this one out. Too much violence is no good for a princess,” you sang sarcastically.

As you stalked off towards the way the men came from, Matt laughed.

“Whatever helps you sleep at night, your Highness.”

* * *

Billy released a shaky breath he didn’t realize he has been holding, the second they exited the garden. He continued walking towards the training grounds, not realizing that Frank and Curtis were lagging far behind, and purposefully so.

“Bill,” Frank called out.

His friend slowed down his pace, but didn’t turn around.

“What?”

“What the fuck was that?”

“What the fuck was what?”

“Don’t bullshit me. You and the princess, Bill. I told you not to do anything, did you do something?”

Now, Billy turned around and gave his friends a weird look, who were giving him questioning looks. Curtis didn’t even argue against what Frank was saying.

“What?” he asked the question with disbelief this time. “No, of course not. I didn’t do anything.”

“Are you sure?” Curtis asked, deadpan. “Because if I didn’t know any better, from that short interaction back there, it looks like it.”

“Not you too, Curt,” Billy complained.

“I told you to stop mooning over her, Bill,” Frank shook his head.

“I’m not-” he sighed angrily, “She and I barely talk. Alright? There couldn’t possibly be anything going on.”

“As if I can’t tell when Billy the Beaut has thing for a girl. I’ve known you for years, Bill. The only difference here is that you’re not allowed, so you can’t do shit.”

“Both of you, stop this. Okay? I don’t have a thing for the-” he stopped and looked around to make sure no one was listening, before lowering his voice. “I don’t have a thing for the princess, alright? I don’t know what you’re talking about, and whatever it is, it isn’t anything. I’m a sad orphan soldier and she’s a fucking princess. We’re from two different worlds, and I have no interest in pursuing her whatsoever. Like you said, it’s stupid.”

Both Frank and Curtis looked unconvinced. Billy turned on his heel and started leaving them behind. He gripped the hilt of his sheathed sword tightly.

“Now let’s do what we came here to do and kick each other’s asses.”

Frank huffed an annoyed breath, and started pushing Curtis towards the training grounds.

“For his sake, I hope he’s right,” Curtis mumbled.

“No kidding.”

* * *

A gasp came out of you as you woke up from another nightmare.

You sat up and clawed at your neck and chest, trying to breathe, only to realize that the castle wasn’t burning anymore. There was no more smoke, you could finally breathe, you were safe. It was just you in your dark room, with nothing but the moonlight illuminating through the large curtained window.

You wiped away at the tears that had been cascading down your face. It always seemed wild to you that crying seemed to be the one thing that happened in both dream and reality. There was no escaping tears, even in sleep.

You hopped off the bed, onto the cold stone floor, and paced back and forth, trying to shake the dream off of you like cobwebs. Still, it didn’t seem to work. You stood there, in your nightgown, and looked around your room. Suddenly you felt like it was too small. The shadows in the corners seemed to contain unseen creatures with eyes that stared back at you, and they were closing in.

Maybe it was in your head, but it felt like it was getting hot again.

You went to double doors that led out to the balcony and pulled them open. Cold air hit your face and your breathed it in with a sigh of relief. You leaned against the balcony and looked over at the backside of the castle. You could see the training grounds, the stables, and the maze beyond. Beyond that were the towns.

You wanted to get out of your room, farther than this balcony. You didn’t want to go back to sleep and you definitely didn’t want to stay in your room. But if you went out through the door, your guards would follow you everywhere.

_“For your protection.”_

You didn’t need protection in your own home. You had said that countless times. But alas, you father was more afraid of the dark than you were. It wasn’t fair that you had to stay within your room during this time of night, when the stars were calling to you. You had to get out.

You’d just have to take the other way.

Without another second thought, you went back into your room and threw on your blue silk robe. You put on your slippers, and padded over to the tapestry that was on the wall across from your bed. You found the edge of it, pulled it back, and disappeared behind it. Blinded by darkness, you used your fingers to feel along the cool stone and moved down the wall until the stone suddenly ended, and a large wooden door began.

You smirked to yourself, found the door knob, and opened the door to let yourself out.

* * *

You snuck around the castle through secret passageways and corridors until you were outside, in a part of the castle grounds that had no guards. When you felt like you were free from any watching eyes, you breathed a sigh and relaxed your shoulders.

You couldn’t help but look up and admire the sky.

The moon was full tonight, so there was no stars in the sky, but that brought no disappointment. The moon was so strikingly beautiful and could hold attention all on her own. There was something so mysterious about her. You could look at her for ages.

You contemplated on where to go. Should you go to the stables again? Or the garden? You could always head over to the library again, if neither of those options suited you. The maze was an option, but it was far too dark, and surely you’d get lost, which would only end in embarrassment.

You decided on the garden, since you loved it there. However, amidst the silence of the night, you heard a faint noise coming from farther down the grounds. You stopped as you were making your way up the steps towards the glass building that was the garden, and listened intently.

Thud.

Thud.

Thud.

_What was that?_

It seemed to come from the training ring. You twisted your lips in thought. Who could be in the training grounds at this hour? Could it be Alex, sneaking out to get some training in late at night? It wouldn’t surprise you. The prince had his own fair share of late night escapades, but then again, the pressure of being a future king made that a bit harder these days.

So, of course, your curiosity got the best of you, and you felt no other choice than to go investigate.

Quietly, you made your way to the training grounds, which was encompassed by a big fence. There was armory, the ring where people trained outside, and on the other side was a small wooden house used for more training.

It was there that the noise seemed to be coming from. As you got closer, the thudding got louder. There was a grunt and the sound of metal hitting wood. Someone was training.

You reached the double doors, which were slightly ajar, and pulled one open. Expecting to see your brother, you raised your eyebrows in surprise when it was, in fact, not.

Instead, inside was none other than Lieutenant William Russo, with no shirt on, half of his hair pulled up, as he was throwing knives at one of the targets that was placed at the far end. He raised his arm and in a quick fluid motion, brought it down halfway and let the knife leave his fingers to slice through air. With a thud it hit the target square in the middle.

It was intriguing to say the least. Even a bit mesmerizing.

You took what was meant to be another quiet step inside, but the door creaked, announcing your arrival. You winced at your mistake. Billy whirled around quickly in your direction, another blade raised him his hand, ready to throw it at any possible threat.

Scared that he might actually kill you, you raised your hands defensively.

“Wait!”

He let out a sharp breath and lowered the knife immediately.

“Your Highness!” he let out sharply, in a scolding manner, but then realized who he was talking to and took a breath.

The light from the torch hanging on the wall, illuminated his face and body in a fiery dance. It was a stark contrast to the moonlight. “You really shouldn’t sneak up on people like that. Especially when they’re holding a weapon. You could’ve lost your head, and I could’ve lost mine.”

“Sorry, I didn’t think anyone would be out here at this hour.”

Without really meaning to, your eyes lingered on his body. The muscles built from years in the military and the scars earned from battle. When he caught you staring, you looked away and your face flushed.

“If it bothers you, I can leave.”

He put down the knives and went about putting his shirt back on.

“No, no, please. Don’t leave. Why would it bother me?”

He shrugged, “I don’t know. Maybe because I’ve…interrupted your alone time?”

You snorted, “If anything, I’m the one who interrupted you. You were here before me after all.”

He inclined his head once, “You’re not wrong.”

He had that look on his face that many others had, like he was afraid to make you angry because of your title. You didn’t like that at all. In fact, you preferred the man who called you out the other night. You were over this tension between the two of you. It wasn’t what you wanted at all.

You stepped fully into the small house and crossed your arms. Finally, you felt the urge to just  let out everything that you had been bottling up these last few days.

“Listen, contrary to what you might think, I’m not that stupid, ignorant princess you might think I am. Okay? Just because people try to do everything for me, doesn’t mean I like it. I don’t need people at my beck and call. And I’m not completely naive or ignorant about what’s going on in the world.”

He put his hands in his pockets and nodded.

“I know, I’m-I’m sorry for speaking to you that way the other night. It was out of turn and I shouldn’t have done that. I apologize.”

“No, but the thing is….” you started, hesitant to finish that sentence, “you weren’t completely wrong.”

He looked at you with confusion and you fiddled with the material of your robe.

“How so?”

“What I said the other night was a mistake. I didn’t mean it that way, and you had a right to say the things you did. I clearly don’t know anything about you, but you also sure as hell don’t know anything about me. But I’m willing to learn.”

Billy looked impressed.

Before he could say anything else, you finally said, “I’m sorry too.”

His brown eyes took you in with total bewilderment. “You’re just full of surprises aren’t you, princess?”

“Why do you say that?”

“Well, I don’t think I’ve ever heard an apology come out of the mouth of a royal before, especially not one who seems so unapologetic about who they are as you.”

You rolled your eyes, “Trust me, It’s new for me too. I just don’t like being painted like something I’m not, so when you said all of those things I took it kind of personally. But then I realized that I was probably proving your point by telling you to fuck off.”

“I wasn’t exactly nice either, your Highness,” he said, picking up a knife and fiddling with it. “Let’s just call us even and start over. Yeah?”

You smiled at him softly, feeling like a weight was lifted from your chest. “Okay.”

“Let me start,” he said, before bowing low. “My name is William Russo, but you can call me Billy.”

You giggled, and returned the dramatic greeting with a deep curtsey. “Pleasure to meet you, Billy. My name is Y/N. Please call me, Y/N, or anything but your Highness.”

He chuckled, “Okay, Y/N. So, what brings you here so late at night, anyway.”

You sighed, the smile leaving your face. “I had a nightmare. Going back to sleep felt like the worst idea, so I decided to take a walk.”

“By yourself?”

“I think I can take care of myself in my own castle, Billy,” you enunciated his nickname as you lowered yourself down on a stack of hay.

“I’m just surprised you don’t have guards following you around this late at night.”

“Oh, well, they still think I’m fast asleep,” you said smugly, “But I know ways of getting around without them knowing.”

“A princess  _and_  an escape artist.”

“I know. It’s a wonder I’m not married yet, isn’t it?”

“The prince of Asgard is truly missing out.”

You both laughed at that.

He leaned against a wooden post, facing you. “You know, you’re probably the first princess I’ve encountered that doesn’t like formal titles. Why? If you don’t mind me asking.”

“Well, when my mother was queen, she liked it when people referred to her by her first name. She said it made her feel closer to the staff and the people. Less high and mighty. Growing up with her, I knew I wanted to be the same way.”

Billy’s lips turned downward as he was impressed with this bit of information.

“Sounds like she was a great woman.”

You hummed in agreement, “You have no idea. Before she got sick, she would take my brother and I out to the towns at least once a month. She said that good kings and queens got to know their people, cared about them, and gave what they could. Unlike so many others.”

Billy’s gaze was fully on you, intrigued.

“She gave so much and taught me so much,” you said, “Too bad once she died, no one was willing to hold the torch.”

“What about you?”

“I’d be more than willing to do what she did, but my father is too scared to let me go out. Especially with this war going on, he thinks something will happen to me. That I’ll get taken or killed.”

“The Hand is ruthless. I don’t blame him for being worried.”

He continued to fiddle with the knife in his hand, and all you could think about now were the questions you had for him. Your curiosity over this man was back in full force. Maybe you were looking for some kind of connection.

“Look at me, rambling,” you shook your head, self conscious. “What about you? Do….do you see your mother often, Billy?”

He opened his mouth to say something, but then closed it in hesitation and looked down at the blade in his hands.

“No. My mother passed away when I was child.”

Your heart sank, remembering what he had said the other night.

_“I lost my parents at an early age. I had no place to call home.”_

You stuttered out an apology, “Oh, I’m so sorry. There I go again. I completely forgot.”

He waved your ramblings away with his hand. “It’s okay. I barely knew her, so missing her shouldn’t be too bad, right?”

You frowned at that, “I mean, she’s your mother. Whether or not you knew her, it’s okay to miss her. The ‘what ifs’ and ‘what could have beens’. It’s okay to mourn them.”

The universe knew that you mourned them. All the time.

He nodded, contemplating your words, “I’ll keep that in mind.”

“So, it’s just you, Frank, and Curtis?”

“And Frank’s family, but yes, pretty much. I’ve been alone most of my life, that is, until I met them. They’re my only family.”

You thought of Matt and Karen, and how they had become like family to you despite no blood relation. They had both come from troubled beginnings, and somehow, your mother had found them. When she died, they were the two people who were by your side the most, despite having your father and brother.

“Everyone deserves a family,” you uttered barely above a whisper.

The two of you shared a look of understanding. There was silence for a few moments. You felt the normal feeling of sadness when delivered this kind of news, but there was also a feeling of finally not being totally alone. Knowing that Billy had lost his mother too, it was sad, but it was a shared sadness.

You eyed one of the knives he had lined up on a table and moved towards them. You pointed at one.

“May I?”

“Yes, of course,” he moved aside to make room for you.

When you reached the table, you picked up the nearest knife by the handle and turned it over in your hands. The light from the torch reflected off of it’s blade, making it look like a weapon made of fire. You had never used one before. Your father never bothered to teach you how to use any weapons since you weren’t a soldier or a prince.

“So, you like knives, huh?”

“They’re kind of my specialty, actually.”

You looked at him in surprise, “Really? So while everyone else uses a sword, you use these?”

“Don’t get me wrong, I love using a sword, or even a bow, but there’s something exhilarating about throwing a knife.”

“Fascinating,” you said, taking your attention off the knife in your hand and turning to face the target that was across from you.

Suddenly a crazy idea hit you, and you were smiling like a child at Billy.

“Will you teach me?” you asked him.

He chuckled and shook his head, “I don’t think that’s a good idea, princess.”

“Why not?”

“Because you’re a princess, and if your father found out, he’d probably have my head.”

You rolled your eyes, “First of all, we don’t do beheadings here. Second of all, there’s no one around to tell him anyway. And third, don’t you think that a princess not learning how to fight is a little old fashioned? I should at least know how to protect myself somehow.”

He nodded, not even arguing against it. “You’re not wrong. I’m just not sure how okay it is for me, a soldier who is also a guest in this castle, to be teaching the king’s daughter how to use a weapon in the middle of the night.”

You shrugged, “I won’t tell if you won’t. Neither of us is planning on going back to bed anytime soon, and I don’t intend on just sitting here and watching you.”

He scoffed and regarded you with amusement. “Y/N-”

You shifted your weight and stood straighter. “I order you to teach me how to throw a knife.”

Although you tried to convey some seriousness with that “order”, your smile betrayed you.

Billy rolled his eyes, “Oh, you order me? Fine. Fine. Get in front of a target, your Highness.”

You ignored the title and stood in the same spot he had been standing in earlier, the knife still in your hand. He took the spot next to you, in front of a different target, and proceeded to explain everything with demonstration.

“So, you have to make sure your stance is correct. Your feet have to be shoulder width apart, with your left leg in front of the right. If you’re left handed, it’s the opposite way. You grab the knife by the blunt side of the blade, extend your left arm out, then lift the knife above your head. Then as you throw it, put all of your momentum in it, and let go.”

He did everything as he explained it, and just as effortlessly as before, the knife went singing through the air and stuck loudly into the wooden target.

He looked at you, “Now you try.”

You followed his directions as best as you could, a bit nervous if you were being honest, but you didn’t show it. With the knife in your right hand, you raised it, and threw it with all your might across the room. However, instead of sticking into the target as gracefully as you hoped, it clattered to the floor beneath it.

You pursed your lips in disappointment.

“Damn.”

Billy opened his mouth and hesitated for a bit, before deciding to walk over to you.

“Here, let me help you.”

He handed you a knife and proceeded to direct you, and you let him.

“Left foot in front of the other.”

You did that.

“Shoulder width apart.”

You adjusted.

“Now, without actually throwing it, show me how you’d throw it.”

You extended your left arm, and lifted your right, before pretending to let the knife fly. He made a noise you could only guess was disapproval.

“What?” you asked.

“You need to lift the knife higher, almost above your head,” he said, and stepped closer to you, but then stopped, “Uh, may I?”

At first you wondered what he meant, until you realized that he wanted to place his hands on you to better direct you. The thought made your heart jump, but not in a bad way.

You nodded, “Yes.”

With that, he placed himself behind you, his chest dangerously close to your back. He put one hand on your left shoulder and the other on your right wrist, adjusting the placement of the knife so that it was almost above your head.

His fingers grazed the skin of your wrist beneath the edge of your sleeve. When he talked, his voice was right at your ear, smooth and warm. You forced yourself to concentrate.

“When you pull back and throw, you have to make sure to twist your body, so that all of that energy goes into the knife,” he twisted your body for you, to show you how. “The left hand is for aim, so you line up the tips of your fingers with the target, pull back from your shoulder, and then throw overhand.”

He moved his left hand to your waist and you glanced down at it for a second, focusing on the motions he was going over with you. Your bodies moved at the same time, and you felt like you finally got the idea of it now.

“Got it?”

His hot breath fanned over the shell of your ear as he asked the question. You glanced at him and nodded.

“Yes.”

“Okay,” he uttered, before taking his hands off of your and stepping away. To your own surprise, you were a tad disappointed. “Let’s see you do it.”

Your straightened your spine and adjusted the knife in your fingers. With everything that he showed you, you raised the knife and your hand, twisted your body, aimed, and swung it overhand, before letting it fly from your fingers. All in a swift motion.

With a thud, the blade of the knife landed into the wooden target. It wasn’t the center, but it was still the target.

Your jaw dropped in shock, and you looked at Billy to see if he was just as shocked as you were. He wasn’t as slack-jawed, but he was definitely smiling wide, and clapping slowly.

“Not bad, Y/N. If you practice enough, then you’ll have another way of scaring off princes in no time.”

“Ha. Thank you, Lieutenant.”

“You’re very welcome, princess.”

The both of you laughed and ended up smiling at each other, maybe for a little too long, until Billy broke away from your gaze and looked down at his feet. You looked at him, and then back at the target.

“I want to try again,” you decided.

You looked back up at him and he was smirking.

“Alright,” he nodded once, handing you another knife, “Again.”

* * *

You don’t know how long you were out there with Billy, but it seem like a lot of time to either you. At least, not until Billy became aware, once again, of the fact that he was out in the middle of the night with a princess. And although you said it didn’t matter, he still had rules to follow, and he was sure this went against them.

In the end, you called it a night when you finally managed to hit the center of the target. Billy called you a natural, which made you very proud, and he could tell. You knew now why he would want to escape in the middle of the night to practice such a thing. One could get out their frustrations my throwing knives.

It made you wonder what Billy was frustrated about, but that was a question for another day.

It was still dark out, so you must not have been out for too long. The two of you carefully snuck back up to the castle as Billy held a torch, and began to part ways when you neared the secret entrance you had come out from. It was up some stairs, behind a suit of armor.

“I had a fun time tonight. Thank you for teaching me that, Billy.”

“You’re welcome, Y/N.”

“Again, I’m sorry about before.”

“It’s not problem. I’m sorry too. I judged you a little bit much, but now I know that was a stupid thing to do. You’re not anything like I thought you were.”

“The feeling is mutual,” you smiled softly.

The flames of the torch in his hand illuminated half of your faces in an orange glow. After a moment, he bowed his head.

“Goodnight, Princess.”

You bowed yours, “Goodnight, William.”

With that, you parted ways, and quickly went up the steps, behind the suit of armor where a secret door was hidden. After walking through a narrow hallway, you reached your room once again.

You closed the door, got out from behind the tapestry, and leaned against one of the wooden bed posts with a sigh. You couldn’t help the small smile that tugged at your lips.


	3. Looking for Freedom

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In this chapter, time passes. Your friendship with Billy blooms so effortlessly after that rough start, and he seems to understand you more than most. When your father gives you an ultimatum disguised as compromise, you want to run away, but something else happens that shakes your world for the better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A lot happens in this chapter, but I promise you won't regret reading it.

That night, was the start of an unexpected friendship between you and Billy. And a lot of it was spent during the night. Neither of you could ever really sleep well, since you both experienced nightmares. Before, you would’ve spent the restless nights alone, but now you had Billy.

It wasn’t always on the training grounds, but sometimes in the library (where you learned how much he liked to read), or the garden (where he learned how much you liked nature). You’d talk about yourselves, your lives, and each would listen with such fascination and intent. You became good friends with him fairly quickly, it was surprising to both of you. 

Sure, you had become friends with Frank and Curtis as well, but you didn’t spend as much time with them as you did with the Lieutenant. And the connection you two had, was very different from those to say the least.

Now, you could safely say there was no bad tension between you . Even when the sun was up, you’d both talk freely, sarcastically, and with smiles. Of course, when your father or brother were around, you could tell he was trying to be more respectful. As well as when you were both busy with your own duties.

In the day time, he spent his time training the soldiers, and going to war council while you took to dealing with your itinerary; horse riding lessons, reading, tea parties, and attending to any lords and ladies that visited the castle.

It wasn’t your ideal way of spending your time, but it was what you were supposed to do as a princess. It was a lot of smiling and talking about nonsense, really. Although you knew that most of the girls you spent time with thought you were odd, especially for rejecting men they’d give their lives to marry. Still, you paid their passive aggressive comments no mind.

* * *

After a long day of socializing, you plopped down on one of the couches in the library. It was the middle of the night, and although sleep would have been the best viable option for you to get rid of your tiredness, you decided to spend some time with Billy yet again.

You looked forward these excursions a lot now. Not only was it an excuse to not face your literal nightmares, but it was also a time when the rest of the world was asleep, and it was just you and him. You weren’t the princess and he wasn’t the soldier at this time. You had no obligations. You were just two humans, two friends, having a conversation.

When he wasn’t being so honorable and didn’t feel the need to treat you by your title in front of others, Billy was much more talkative and funny. He made you laugh in ways that not many people could. In fact, the only other person that managed to keep up with your sarcasm and sense of humor was Matthew, but there was a part of him that was always your teacher, and the hand of the king.

“Why do you even have a maze to begin with?” Billy asked as the two of you sat on the floor of the library, by the fireplace. The rest of the room was dark, save for the bit of the moonlight that crept in through the curtains. 

You hummed, “For entertainment purposes, really. Whenever there’s a ball or a big party, the guests enjoy trying to see if they can figure it out on their own.”

“And do they?”

“No. Most the time they get so lost that they freak out,” you laughed.

Billy chuckled along with you. “And do you know how to get out?”

“Of course,” you scoffed, “It’s quite simple, really.”

He furrowed his brows at you in confusion. “Oh?”

You shrugged, “There’s a trick to it. All you have to do is put your hand against the right side of the maze and follow the path until you get out.”

“That’s all you have to do?”

“If worse comes to worse, then yes.”

He nodded to himself, “That’s a clever idea.”

“To be honest, my brother taught me that one when we’re children,” you explained, “One day I went in there, by myself, and got lost. My parents were worried sick, but then Alex found me, crying my eyes out. Then he told me that if this ever happened again, all I had to do was do this one trick, and follow the maze through.”

“Of course, I grew up here so I have the maze memorized at this point,” you added.

“So you have a double advantage? That doesn’t sound very fair.”

“I’m the princess, I think I deserve the advantage,” you teased.

He scoffed, “And do you ever tell any of the guests these things?”

“No. Then everyone would be able to get out, and that defeats the purpose of trying to solve the maze, doesn’t it?” 

This made him laugh. No doubt he thought you were ridiculous, but still he smiled. He never gave any indication that he didn’t like what you were saying.

“You’re not wrong,” he said, which was your guys’ way of agreeing with each other without admitting the other was right.

You glanced at him and he was smiling and shaking his head softly.

“I’ll, uh, keep that trick in mind should I ever find myself lost in there,” he said.

“Although, something tells me you don’t get lost very often, Billy. You seem like someone who’s quick on their feet, ready to tackle any problem that arises,” you said.

Whereas you…you liked to dive headfirst into things when the impulse told you to, regardless of whether you thought it through or not.

“Mmmm, I think growing up the way I did forced me to be that way. I had to do whatever it took to survive. It’s the same in the military. There’s no room for stupid decisions.”

“Makes sense.”

You fell into a comfortable silence, and both gazed into the fire. The embers danced so beautiful, you almost wanted to touch them. But you knew if you got too close, you’d end up getting burned.

For a second Billy’s eyes went to your face, watching how the fire cast a glow on your skin, and changed the color of your eyes. When you felt his gaze on you, you looked up, only to find that he had looked away.

You sighed silently in disappointment.

“Do you have a favorite quote, Billy?” you asked suddenly, looking at him sidelong. “You said you liked to read a lot. Do you have one?”

He furrowed his brow and looked harder into the flames as if he could find an answer there.

“Uhhh,” he started pensively, “There is this one quote that I remember reading during my first year at sea. I can’t remember who wrote it, but it stuck with me for a long time.”

You scooted a little closer to him, intrigued, “What was it?”

“It goes, ‘Now is no time to think of what you do not have. Think of what you can do with what there is’,” he recited. “You can imagine how helpful that was to a kid like me.”

You nodded, “Hemingway.”

He looked at you now, confused by the name.

“That’s who wrote it,” you clarified. You had read enough poetry to know so many names now. “Ernest Hemingway.”

“Yeah, yeah, that’s it.”

After a pause, he flipped the question. “What about you? Do you have a favorite quote?”

Your eyes widened, “I have so many, it would be impossible to pick a favorite…but…one that sticks out to me was from this book of poems I was obsessed with growing up. It’s short, and goes, ‘I am now fallen, stardust envelops me’.”

When you looked at Billy he had a thoughtful expression on his face.

“it’s by Virginia Woolf. I don’t know what it means, but I always thought it sounded beautiful,” you added.

“Sounds very you,” he said.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

He shrugged, “It just reminds me of you. Magical and mysterious. Can’t quite put your finger on it, but there’s something deeper there.”

You gave him a weird look, not sure if you should be offended or not. As if reading your thoughts, he gave you a reassuring smile and quipped,

“It’s a compliment.”

Knowing that it was just that, a compliment, you didn’t know what to say. To be compared to such a beautiful phrase was not something anyone had done to you. In fact, you weren’t compared to many beautiful things to begin with. It made you feel warm inside, like your own little fire had  been started within you.

“Thank you,” you whispered after a long beat.

He grinned at you, and you shared a moment of not taking your eyes off of each other’s faces. The worst part, was when he finally decided to look away. It was something that would come to hurt you…every. single. time.

* * *

A day or so later, your father requested your presence in the meeting room where he held his war councils. It was annoying to you, how he couldn’t simply come find you himself, but of course, the king was too busy to talk to his own daughter. So, he sent Karen.

Karen walked with you through the marbled interior of the castle, leading you to the meeting room. The guards standing at their designated posts would bow their heads as you passed, and you smiled at them in return.

“I wonder what he wants,” you wondered. Although you already had an idea.

The only times he’s ever invited you into the war council room was to tell you that another man was on his way to ask for your hand. That is, when he had the courtesy of letting you know. You couldn’t count how many times you had been practically dragged out of your room when a prince would pop by without you knowing beforehand.

“Another suitor?”

You groaned softly, “That’s what I’m afraid of. Hasn’t the world run out of princes for me to reject?”

“You’d think so wouldn’t you?” she smirked. “Give him a chance, maybe this next one will surprise you.”

The large wooden door leading to the meeting room came into view. On its surface was a perfectly carved out tree to tell it apart from the rest.

You scoffed, “Men are rarely ever surprising, Karen. That includes the King.”

Karen tried hard not to laugh at your joke about the king, but failed at hiding it. As you reached the door, she bowed her head to leave you.

“Good luck,” she whispered.

You smiled at her, took a deep breath, and nodded at the guard standing by the door to open it for you. It groaned on its hinges, announcing your arrival to your father, who up ahead, was standing over a map at the far end of a long wooden table. Your brother was standing next to him.

Upon your arrival, their heads snapped in your direction. You smiled at them both, innocently, as you kept your distance at the opposite end of the table.

“You wanted to see me?”

He turned to your brother, “Leave us, please, Alex.”

Alex took his sword that was resting on the table and did as he was told. As he made his way towards you, you searched his eyes for any sign of what your father was about to tell you. When his eyes met yours, he gave you a pained, apologetic smile.

Your put your hand on his shoulder, stopping him from going any further, and questioned him with your gaze.

He simply should his head and whispered, “I’m sorry.”

Before you could voice anything aloud, or ask him to stay, he stepped out of your grasp and left the meeting room. You stood frozen there for a second, not sure what to make of that small interaction. Your mind tried to come up with some kind of scenario that would prompt your brother to act like this, and you just weren’t sure which one to pick.

It made your anxious heart beat even faster.

“Please, sit, Y/N,” the King’s deep voice brought you back.

You turned back to face your father and narrowed your eyes at him.

“No, I think I’m fine just standing. If you don’t mind.”

He heaved a heavy sigh, and said, “Very well,” before lowering himself down on the chair. The wood creaked beneath his weight.

“Why did you call me here?” you asked, resting your hands at the top of the nearest chair, and staring down at your father.

“I think you already have an idea why.”

You rolled your eyes. Of course.

“I was hoping I was wrong.”

“You know I don’t like doing this, Y/N, but I have to.”

You crossed your arms aggressively, “Do you, really? You know it’s okay to break tradition, right?”

“Y/N, we’ve been over this. When I die, your brother is to become king. He’s already promised to a princess in Norta and they are to be married after the war is over. That is his fate. You, my dear, aren’t next in line to rule this kingdom. You can’t be a queen if you don’t marry a prince from somewhere else. Otherwise, what will you do?”

“What will I do?” you repeated, more incredulous. “See the world, maybe? Meet new people? Help them? If you let me out of this god forsaken castle once in a while, I could figure that out.”

“You can do all of those things when you’re a queen. You’ll have the power to do whatever you want.”

“Yes, I’ll have power, but at what cost? What about my happiness?” you argued. “What if I want to marry for love?”

“Happiness and love come after, my girl. Your mother and I didn’t know each other before we got married, but after we did, I got to know her and I fell in love with her. Maybe that’ll happen for you too.”

You pinched the bridge of your nose and resisted the urge to scream. You couldn’t count how many times you had heard this speech. You understood that he had more life experience, but why was it that adults insisted that life would be the same for every individual. Why did they assume that every person was a carbon copy of each other, and that we were doomed to live the same fate?

“That’s not what I want,” you whispered.

No matter, you’ll just find some other way of making this next guy hate you.

When you steeled yourself a little, you finally looked back at your father and asked,

“So, who is he anyway? Another prince?”

The king pushed himself up from the chair. “No, as a matter of fact, he’s not.”

You raised your eyebrows in surprise. “A lord then?”

“No,” he breathed. “He’s the hand of the king.”

Still not getting what he was saying, you furrowed your brow. “Which king?”

“This king.”

You stared at him for what felt like forever. Your eyes went from being as narrow as slits, to widening to the size of craters. Your jaw fell open and your heart hammered in your chest at a rapid pace. It was a wave of disbelief as the realization hit you all at once.

“Matthew? You want me to marry Matthew?”

The question came out a sharp whisper.

“Yes.”

You couldn’t believe what he was saying.

He wanted you to marry Matthew, who was a teacher and a cherished friend for years. Yes, you loved him, but you weren’t in love with him. He was like family to you, like a brother. Once in a blue moon you probably fantasized about marrying him, but that disappeared as quickly as it came. Today, thinking about marrying him, and possibly having children with him made you sick to your stomach.

“Father, you’re insane.”

“Y/N, please.”

You shook your head, “No.”

“Y/N…”

“No!” you shouted, getting angrier every second, tears filling your eyes, “You can’t make me do that. You can’t.”

“I can and I will,” he was adamant as he made his way around the table.

“He’s one of the few friends that I have and marrying him would ruin that.”

“How do you know? Maybe it’ll reinforce it. Make it better. The two of you would make a great pair.”

Is that what he thinks?

“You really don’t get it, do you?” you seethed. “Does he know about this?”

There was a pause and then, “No. Not yet. Because I’m still giving you a choice.”

“What’s the other choice?”

“Pick a suitor from the list we’ve provided, or else I will tell Matthew and the deal will be done.”

You mouth stayed wide open. “You think forcing me to choose, is a choice?”

“You can’t run this one out, Y/N,” he said, evading your question.

Tears were streaming down your cheeks.

“Why are you doing this?”

“Y/N, at this point you’ve given me no other choice. I’m just trying to do what’s best for you.”

“Best for me?” you cried. “Forcing me to be with someone I don’t want. To live a life I don’t want to live. Just because I’m not a man, a prince, an heir -  just because I’m not the prized jewel of the family, I have to get shipped off to another kingdom to never be seen again? To be someone else’s problem?”

You father kept silent, which you took as enough of an answer. He wasn’t looking at you now, but you kept your eyes on him, furious. You kept talking, you voice lower and filled with viscous emotion.

“Is it because I’m not like him? Is it because I’m not perfect and listen to everything you say?”

“No, of course not, Y/N. I never once asked you to be like your brother.”

You tore your gaze from the floor and burned it into your father.

“Then what?” you asked with a frustrated gesture of your hands. “Is it because I remind you of her?”

The air seemed to be sucked out of the room with that question. By “her”, you meant your mother. The one who’s death wreaked havoc on the entire family. Not only did you look exactly like her, but a lot of your worldviews came from her. A lot of her softer, more compassionate personality traits went to Alex, while you inherited the stubbornness and sharp tongue from you dad. However, you got her resolve and need for justice.

It wouldn’t surprise you if your mere presence hurt your father. In fact, in your mind, it rang true. Even if he didn’t admit it.

“Is that why you want me gone?” you asked. You were shaking, though you tried to hide it by balling your hands into fists at your sides. Suddenly the room was starting to feel smaller and smaller and you needed to get out. To flee. You couldn’t be here anymore.

His eyes were red rimmed when he looked at you. He shook his head and took a step towards you, but the time he took to reply wasn’t so reassuring.

“Y/N, no. That’s not-”

You took a step back, towards the door. Tears dripped down onto your dress, onto the floor.

“Don’t worry, father. You won’t have to worry about me much longer.”

You backed up until you you were completely pressed against the door. Deftly, you reached behind you and grasped the doorknob, and turned it to let yourself out. Your father called out to you, but you were already slamming the door shut, and stumbling out into the corridor.

“Are you alright, you Highness?” the guard asked.

You didn’t bother to look at him or answer him. All you wanted to do was get away, as far as you could from your father before he could catch you. Far from this god forsaken castle and the people in it. You felt like you were drowning and you needed air.

So, you grabbed the skirts of your dress, and ran.

* * *

Strings from wooden bows were pulled taught as a line of soldiers stood in a line in the training ring. Some young, some old, and almost none of them had seen a real battle. Not yet, anyway.

Frank and Billy stood at the edge, their hands behind their back, as the men held steady.

Then in his gruff voice, Frank called, “Ready! Fire!”

All at once the men let their bows fly, however, not all were lucky enough to get as far as the target. Some of the bows ricocheted too far, some landed just at the foot of the target, and some dropped sadly at their feet. Only a few arrows stuck where they were supposed to, which was fine considering that they had only just started practicing with bows.

Still, it was enough to make the Captain and Lieutenant snicker amongst themselves.

“The poor bastards are helpless,” Billy shook his head.

Frank punched him playfully in the arm, “Don’t forget, Bill. You were once just like those poor bastards.”

“Yes, but I learned quick, at least.”

“We can’t all be as perfect as you, Bill,” Frank smirked at him.

Billy rolled his eyes, and was about to give him some kind retort, before he noticed the look on his friend’s face. He was looking behind him, past the fence of the ring, with a frown and furrowed brow. Billy followed his gaze, and any trace of sarcasm fell from his face.

Coming down from the palace grounds, was you. But not like you always did. No, this time you were running at full speed, your hands fisted in your dress skirts, crying. You paid no mind to him, Frank, or anyone else around you. Instead, Billy noticed you were headed for the stables.

He and Frank exchanged a look of complete confusion, and Billy was already hopping over the ring to go check on you. He had never seen you this way. Clearly something was wrong.

Suddenly, a guard coming from the direction you came from, yelled,

“Someone stop her!”

What the hell?

Beside his bewilderment, Billy kicked into action, and ran over the ring to stop you from whatever it was that you were about to do. He seemed to be the only one fast enough, probably because he wasn’t wearing a suit of armor.

Just as he was about to reach the stables, there was a, “Hiya!” followed by the stomping of hooves, and the gust of wind as you rushed out of the stables on the back of a black horse. Billy stumbled back, out of your way, so as to not get trampled.

“Y/N!” he called out to you, but it was no use.

Without wasting another second, he went to the nearest horse that was still saddled up, and hopped on, setting a course after you.

* * *

You bounded through the castle on your raven colored horse, holding on for dear life to the reigns as you went up the path towards the palace gates. Your hair came loose in the wind, and it flew behind you, as did your dress.

You could hear the palace guards calling to you, telling you to stop, but that meant nothing to you at this point. It was their job to keep you on the castle grounds, but you were looking to get out.

The tears you once cried were not dry on your cheeks. The only thing left was your anger, your determination, and your need to flee.

There was the sound of another set of hooves, and for a second you thought that the guard were already tailing you, but when another voice called out to you, you were in for a surprise.

“Y/N!”

The voice surprised you. It was Billy. You didn’t have to look back at him to figure it out, his voice was something that came to be familiar to you. You dared a glance back, and just as you suspected, he was following you close behind on a grey spotted horse. His brown locks flowed behind him.

“Y/N, stop!”

But, of course, you didn’t listen to him. Instead, you looked straight ahead, towards the large archway of the palace gate that was currently wide open. Beyond you could see the thick greenery of the forest surrounding the castle.

“Lower the gate!” a guard yelled.

You glared, and whipped the reigns to make your horse go faster.

“Don’t!” Billy yelled, knowing that if they lowered it down too late, it could crush you or him.

They followed his orders, and with full speed ahead, you went through the gate with Billy in tow. Passing that barrier alone was enough to lift some kind of invisible weight off of you. You felt like a bird let out of a cage.

Before you knew it, you were amongst the trees, on a road to nowhere. If you were honest, you weren’t sure where you were going, or what you planned to do. You just didn’t want to go back. Not now.

You decided to veer off the road, and go straight through the woods. For a while, you got pretty far, but Billy was just as fast as you, if not faster. He had to be good at everything, the asshole, even horseback riding.

“Y/N!” Billy called again, but this time, he was next to you, his horse going parallel to yours. “Y/N, stop!”

You shook your head, trying to keep your eyes one what was ahead, but also on him.

“Go away, Billy!”

“Y/N, whatever’s going on, let’s talk about this.”

“There’s nothing to talk about!”

“Obviously there is!” 

“Just leave me alo-”

Your horse came to a startling stop as a rabbit scurried across its path, making you stop mid sentence. It lifted itself on its hind legs, and despite your efforts to hold on as best as you could, she bucked you off completely.

With a gasp, you fell onto the forest floor. Your back, elbows, and hips screamed with pain, and you barely had time to process that your horse was still going wild on its hind legs. You lifted an arm up to protect yourself should she stomp on you, and you were sure that she would, but just in time, Billy was shielding you with his body.

He held you close to his chest, protecting your head with his arms and broad torso. You fisted your hand in his shirt, and closed your eyes, genuinely scared that something would happen. It wasn’t until the whinnying stopped and your horse ran off that the two of you looked up.

For a second he seemed to forget his code and held your face in his hands, checking you for any scratches or bruises. There was a protective worry there that you liked, and having his hands on you made you forget for a second why you were even there.

“Are you okay?” he asked.

“Yes, I’m fine,” you said softly.

He nodded, and got up from the ground, before holding his hands out to you. You took them, and he pulled you back up to your feet. Leaves and dirt were stuck to your hair and dress, and you tried your best to brush them off.

“Alright. I need to take you back to the castle. Get on the horse,” he said, motioning with his head to the grey spotted horse.

You stood in place and shook your head, “No.”

He raised his eyebrows at you. “No?”

“No.”

“What do you mean, ‘No’?”

“I mean, no, I’m not getting on that horse, and no, I’m not going back to the castle.”

“Why not?”

“Because I don’t want to. That simple,” you snapped, and turned around to walk in the direction you were heading in initially. Billy followed closely behind.

“And where do you plan on going with no horse, no money, and no food?”

“Away. To the towns. Anywhere but here.”

It wasn’t logical, but you didn’t care about logic at the moment. Billy didn’t seem to get the memo, or he cared more about your well being than you did.

“Oh yeah? And what do you plan to do once you get there, huh? How are you gonna survive?”

“You managed to do it. So can I.”

He sighed and shook his head in exasperation.

“Come on, Y/N.” Billy tried to stop you, and put a hand on your arm, but you pulled away from him sharply. He lifted his hands defensively.

“Just go away, Billy,” you sobbed, to your own surprise. You tried blinking back the tears flooding your vision. “Leave me alone. Tell them you couldn’t find me.”

His face softened, as did his voice, “You know I can’t do that.”

“Why not?” you asked like an angry child. “Because my father told you to find me? He gave you the order, is that why?”

“He didn’t give me any orders. Nobody did.”

“Then why are you here?”

He took a long time to answer and just stared back at you with his big brown eyes. When he finally said anything, it wasn’t what you expected at all.

“Because something tells me that you don’t actually want to be alone.”

He wasn’t wrong. Not one bit. You just wondered how the hell a man you had only known for a short amount of time could tell how you were feeling more than any of the other people in your life. It made you want to cry even more.

You could see the cogs working in his mind as he contemplated something in his brain. Probably trying to figure out how to get you back home, or whether or he should do that. Wind swept through the forest, making your dress and both your hair dance along with the trees.

Finally, Billy crossed his arms, and said, “You know what? Fine. You want to get out of the palace, take a walk in the woods, clear your head? Be my guest. But if you think I’m gonna leave your side for one second, then you have another thing coming.”

“Billy…” you started to protest.

The trampling of hooves and men yelling tore your gaze from Billy. Behind him, up the path you had created, was a group of three guardsmen, looking for you. They were ready to drag you back to the palace, and you just about ran in the other direction.

Billy raised a hand to them, signaling for them to wait, and then turned back to you.

He shrugged, “Your choice, princess.”

* * *

Billy told the guards to leave the two of you, that you just needed space to yourself, he’d have you back soon. Given that he was a Lieutenant, and they respected him, they didn’t question him. Billy had a way of leading people so effortlessly. No doubt your father would protest either. 

The two of you walked at an even pace. Billy kept his distance from you, moreso to give you space than anything. His hand kept a firm grasp around the reigns of his horse as he walked it alongside him.

You hugged your arms against yourself as you walked. The bottom of your dress dragged against the earth and was dirty with mud, twigs, and leaves.  You barely noticed, or didn’t care, as you were deep in thought. In fact, you were barely taking in your surroundings anymore.

Billy occasionally glanced at you. He wasn’t used to you being so silent for such a long period of time. He didn’t know what happened between you and your father, but whatever it was, must have been a breaking point for you. 

Part of him wanted to question you about it, but the other part remained respectful and told him not to pry. If you were going to talk, you’d talk when you were ready.

All that he knew for certain was that when he saw you cry, he couldn’t leave you alone.

* * *

You appreciated the space he was giving you. Literally and figuratively. 

If you were being honest, you felt safer this way. Now that you were less angry, and thinking things through, you realized he was right…again. Who knows what would’ve happened if you had run off on your own? What would’ve happened to you?

At least this way, you had the freedom of roaming the forest, away from the castle, while also being kept company, and having protection. Billy was a hundred times better than any guard. Not just because he was more skilled, and you trusted him more than you could put into words, but also because he was more enjoyable to have around.

He put you at ease.

He was never without his sharp tongue, but if today was any proof, he also had a gentler side. You could tell he didn’t feel the need to treat you like glass, but he also knew you weren’t unbreakable. Why else would he still be here, by your side, despite not knowing what cause you want to run away?

You took a deep breath, and contemplated on whether or not you should share what your father told you. Was that crossing some sort of line? Well, taking into consideration how much time you had started to spend with him, you already crossed that line. You were friends at this point, you liked to think. And if worse came to worse, you were going to end up marrying Matt anyway and the whole kingdom was going to find out soon enough.

Besides, Billy was probably dying to know anyway. He was just being respectful, wasn’t he?

You fiddled with your fingers for a minute, before deciding to just let it all out.

“He wants me to marry Matthew,” you blurted out. “My father.”

Billy stopped moving for a second, surprised by the statement. It was only when he realized you were still moving that he kept going.

“He said that if I don’t pick someone to marry soon, he’s going to force me to.”

“Really? And that makes you feel…?”

“Angry,” you spit out. “To say the least.”

“Why? From what I’ve seen, you and Matt seem really close. The two of you have spent a lot of time together, I imagine. I would’ve thought you would’ve liked having him as an option over anyone else.”

You barely noticed, but there was a hint of jealousy in his tone.

You scoffed, “I’m sure that’s exactly the kind of logic my father used too, but no, you’re both wrong. I love Matt, but not like that. He’s like family to me, and I trust him with my life, but I can’t imagine giving myself to him in that way.”

“But I bet the king thinks that he’s giving me some kind of choice, or making some kind of compromise by making me marry someone that I know and trust. He thinks falling in love will come after like it did for him and my mom, but he doesn’t understand that I don’t want that. Or he doesn’t care.”

You spoke more out of exasperation now. There were no tears and no fury, just dry sorrow as you vented. You hadn’t even realized that you had moved closer to Billy until he spoke up.

“And what do you want, Y/N?”

You looked up at him. He was only a foot or two away from you. One more step to the right and your shoulders would brush together.

“Freedom,” you said without hesitation, “Freedom to do what I want, to go where I want….to fall in love….and marry who I want.”

You stopped walking, as did Billy.

“And I want that for Matthew too. If he’s forced to marry me instead of someone he’s in love with, simply because of my stubbornness, then I could never forgive myself,” you lamented, looking down at your hands.

He raised an eyebrow. “Is he? In love with someone?”

You opened your mouth and closed it, afraid to say anything since the secret you had been keeping was meant for your ears only. In fact, you probably wouldn’t have found out yourself if you weren’t so close to the two of them.

Because when you were busy entertaining the lords and ladies, going to parties, and attending lessons, Matt and Karen spent a lot of time together. You weren’t sure what exactly went on between them, you just knew that the way they looked at each other when they thought you weren’t looking, was something you envied.

You smiled softly, thinking of them now. “Yes, he is. Lucky him.”

You started walking again, and Billy narrowed his eyes at you.

“I suppose you won’t tell me who?”

You hummed, “Not me, that’s for sure.” You looked over your shoulder to smirk at him. “But that’s all I’ll tell you, Lieutenant.”

* * *

Your explanation of what happened was a bit of an emotional rollercoaster for Billy. He felt sympathy and anger for you, of course. Then, jealousy. However, one thing was for certain: he never felt a wave of relief like the one he did knowing that you felt nothing for Matt Murdock, and that he felt nothing for you. At least not romantically.

It shouldn’t have made him feel so good, but it did. It wasn’t like he had a chance anyway. He kept telling himself that it was impossible and that being with a princess could never happen. You were supposed to marry someone of her stature, it was clear from what your father was forcing you to do.

Besides, he wasn’t a romantic guy. At least that’s what he told himself. He was used to being with women, but it never developed into anything serious. In all honesty, it was mostly for the thrill and the sex. He couldn’t get attached, because by the next day he was on a boat and sailing out to sea yet again.

When the king invited him and Frank to the castle, he promised himself that he’d stop all of that, that he’d get serious and focus on the war. Little did he know that the universe had other plans, other ways to test his emotions and temptations.

Still, he told himself not to cross the line. He couldn’t cross the line.

It was an ongoing mantra that only seemed to work less and less every time, and still, the more time he spent with you, the more he felt himself longing to be in your presence. All of those nights you spent together, getting to know each other, it added a joy to his life he never really had before.

He enjoyed being around you. You were so full of confidence and life, even if you didn’t know it, he did. It was a shame that this life you was born into seemed to stifle that. You were an ocean being forced into a chalice.

The two of you fell into small, comfortable conversation now. For the first time all day, he heard you laugh, and because of a joke he made. It made him feel happy and proud to have done that.

After a short distance, the sound of rushing water silenced you. Which meant that the river was not very far. You perked your head up, scanning the area to see where it was, as did Billy.

If they could find the river, then he could orient himself a bit better, and get you back home without much struggle.

“Look,” you said, pointing up ahead.

Billy looked in that direction, and saw a large deer with antlers sticking out of its head. It was standing at the edge of the river, minding its own business as it bowed down to take a drink. It was so big and beautiful, a docile creature.

You were beaming with delight at the sight.

You tried to take slow, steady steps towards the river, so as to not scare it off. However, one wrong step and a twig snapped beneath your foot. The deer lifted its head, instantly on high alert, and with a wiggle of its ears, it scurried away.

You frowned, but continued on towards the edge of the river.

* * *

The blue water moved at a deceivingly calming pace here. But you knew that if you were to fall in, it would carry you down as quickly as you came. 

Thick, brown, mud patterned with rocks lined the edges. Tall grass stuck out from here and there was well. Every now and then you’d see a fish swimming downstream, or a squirrel come to take a drink on the other side.

Upon looking down, you caught a glimpse of your reflection. Internally, you felt like a mess, externally, you didn’t look as bad. Aside from the bottom of your dress, the only physical signs of your distress was the frizziness of your hair and your tear stained cheeks. Whatever powders that were applied to your face in the morning were long gone.

While Billy tied the horse to a nearby tree, you sat down on a log by the riverbank and watched the water flow. The sound of the water mixed with the rushing winds and noises of nature, was enough to make you feel calmer. It was like the garden, but even better.

Billy hovered behind you. You peeked over at him and noticed him leaning against a tree. So, you scooted over, and patted the space next to you.

“Come on. I don’t bite,” you said, “Contrary to popular belief.”

He chuckled, but made no arguments, and gracefully sat down next to you. For a few moments, the two of you said nothing, just watched the river run its course.

After a while, Billy asked, “What are you going to do?”

“I don’t know. Enjoy what little freedom I have while it lasts, I suppose. He said to choose someone, but, I don’t know if I can. I don’t know if there’s anyone that I love. In fact, I’m starting to think that love isn’t possible for someone like me at all.”

“I refuse to believe that.”

“And why is that?”

“I mean, you obviously believe it exists.”

“In theory.”

“In theory?” he sputtered.

“Don’t laugh, it’s true,” you poked him in the arm, then proceeded to explain, “I hear about it all the time, read about it in books, I’ve seen it from afar, but…I’ve never felt it. No one seems to feel it for me. Not romantic love, at least. So…how do I know it’s actually real? How do I know it’s not all a lie?”

He looked exasperated, on the edge of laughter.

“Listen, I’ve been there. To be honest, I didn’t believe love existed until I saw the way Frank looked at his wife and kids, at how unafraid he was to be vulnerable in front of Maria,” he said, “I might not be the type of man who knows a lot about falling in love first hand, or a man that has done a lot of romantic things in his life….but seeing a son of a bitch like Frank be like that? It gives you hope, you know?” 

“Sounds like Frank and his wife have a very beautiful relationship.”

He nodded, “They do. He writes to her and his kids once a week. Like clockwork.”

It sounded like something from a fairytale. You didn’t know such a rugged, and burly man like Frank could be like that. He was all joked and brawn around the castle, but as it tuns out, he has softer side. You had to remind yourself never to assume anything about a soldier ever again.

And to think Billy was a hopeless romantic.

“How nice to have someone that cares about you that much,” you mused.

He clicked his tongue in annoyance. “You always act like no one cares about you, Y/N, but they do. Trust me, people do.”

“Pray tell. Name a few that I’m not related to, please.”

“Matt, Karen…hell, even Curtis and Frank.”

You looked at him curiously and couldn’t help but think that someone else was missing from that list.

“Anyone else?”

“I’m sure there’s plenty you haven’t noticed.”

“Like who?….you?”

You asked the question as a joke, but his reaction turned it into more than that.

He gave you a strange look, his cheeks turned pink with a blush. “Me? I-I don’t-”

You wondered why he reacted in such a way. You had never seen him so flustered before.

“What? It’s a simple question. We’re…friends…right? So, do you care about me?”

“I mean…yeah, when you put it that way…of course I care about you, princess,” he chuckled nervously, looking down at his hands.

 _“When you put it that way”?_  What was that supposed to mean? What was he hiding? 

You wanted him to look at you so bad, to say it to your face, that he cared about you. To say what he truly meant. It was a deep need that you had, and you realized that it came from a place you never knew existed.

You looked at him now, and you found yourself questioning every emotion you’ve felt towards him these past few weeks, and everything you just said about not loving someone. You noticed the way he looked at you, listened to you, talked to you, and overall how he treated you. And you were struck with a question you didn’t think you’d be asking yourself about anyone.

_What if?_

You obviously felt an attraction towards him. He made you feel something you still didn’t know how to define. It started off as thinking he was attractive, but that physical attraction only goes to far. Now, what you felt was something deeper, something mysterious and exciting and frightening. It was foreign, but now you wondered if the reason you didn’t know how to describe it, is because you had never felt such an emotion before.

You didn’t think it existed. Not for you. 

Was it possible that he felt the same way too?

“I care about you too, Billy,” you said, shyly, but daring. The words were innocent, but your tone wasn’t.

He looked up at you. His chocolate brown eyes were like an ocean, not in color, but in depth. You wanted to dive in and let them swallow you up, maybe then you’d have a clue what was going on in there.

His eyes flitted between yours and then went to your lips. His own pink lips looked so inviting and you had the sudden urge to just lean in and kiss him. To tangle your fingers in his hair. Even if it was to see what happens.

You moved in closer to him, so that your shoulders were touching, and you could feel each other’s breath. His hitched, as did yours.

“Y/N,” he said, almost as a warning.

“Billy.”

He looked down at the river again, “Don’t.”

He knew what you were thinking. He knew what you wanted to do, and even though he was telling you not to try it, he didn’t move an inch. It must have meant that he wanted to do it too.

“Why not?”

“Because I shouldn’t. We shouldn’t.”

“Says who?” you asked, putting your hand over his.

He immediately looked there, and then at you. Your eyes were big and pleading. Every inch of you was hungry with desire. You both stayed like that, dangerously close, your breathing getting heavy, as did the air.

And then suddenly, something in Billy snapped.

“Fuck it.”

He put his hand to the back of your neck and crashed his lips into yours. It was jarring at first, but after the initial shock, you deepened the kiss, and grabbed a hold of his white shirt. The kiss was fervent and breathless, evident that you had both been craving to do it for so long.

For the first time in a long time, you felt alive. The rushing of the river and the songs of the forest disappeared, because right now, there was only you and him.


End file.
